Is AI Making Us Rude?

How AI is quietly reshaping the way we interact with each other.

English speakers, feel free to skip this part! 🇮🇹💙

Amici! Il mio corso "Mastering CX" è finalmente online! 🎉 Se non l’avete ancora fatto, correte a dare un’occhiata e iniziate subito a migliorare la vostra Customer Experience. Trovate tutte le info e il link per l'acquisto QUI: https://products.giuseppestigliano.com/mastering-cx 🚀

Buongiorno everyone! 👋

I’m currently traveling through Latin America to promote the Spanish edition of Redefining Retail, and as much as my Spanish has improved, I still struggle sometimes. 😅

When that happens, I don’t waste time crafting a polite request—I just open ChatGPT and type: “Translate this to Spanish!” No greetings, no pleasantries, just a direct command for efficiency.

And that got me thinking. AI tools are designed to be fast, direct, and transactional. ⚙️

But when we interact this way day after day, does it start shaping how we communicate with people too? Are we unconsciously making our conversations more abrupt, transactional, and stripped of the nuances that make human interactions… well, human?

It turns out, researchers have been asking the same questions—and the findings are fascinating. 👀

The AI spillover effect

I recently came across an article by Nicholas A. Christakis, the director of the Human Nature Lab at Yale University 🎓, that summarized multiple studies exploring how AI doesn’t just influence our direct interactions with technology—it spills over into the way we treat other people.

Unlike AI built for technical tasks, AI designed for human-like interactions—like chatbots or virtual assistants—subtly but significantly alters social behavior. And these shifts can go both ways.

One experiment showed that when people interacted with cooperative AI partners 🤝, they became more generous and collaborative with other humans. But the opposite was also true—when AI models acted selfishly, human participants mirrored that behavior, becoming more self-serving themselves.

Another study found that when people used AI to delegate dishonest tasks—such as reporting a false dice roll to earn money—cheating rates soared. 📈

Even AI assistance in driving has social consequences. Research showed that when people relied on auto-steering and auto-braking features, they became less likely to take turns yielding on the road, leading to riskier driving when AI assistance was removed.

The takeaway is clear 💡: AI doesn’t just react to human behavior—it reshapes it. And as AI becomes more embedded in daily life, understanding these effects is more important than ever.

Losing the little things

One of the reasons AI-driven interactions can be so appealing is that they strip away friction.

Need a quick translation? Want a perfect email draft? AI delivers—no small talk, no waiting, no effort. ⚡

But in the pursuit of speed and efficiency, we risk losing the little things—the social rituals that make human interactions meaningful. Saying “please” and “thank you” isn’t just about politeness; it reinforces respect, patience, and cooperation.

If AI teaches us that efficiency is the ultimate goal, we risk losing the softer skills that hold society together: empathy, compromise, and shared responsibility. 💙

Think about how we talk to AI. Virtual assistants prioritize speed, not social etiquette.

We don’t say, “Excuse me, Siri, would you mind setting a reminder?” We say, “Siri, reminder: meeting at 10.” This makes sense for technology, but what happens when we bring this behavior into our daily lives? 🏠

For children growing up with AI, the stakes are even higher. If they see their parents barking orders at Alexa, will they internalize that as a normal way to speak to people?

Some tech companies have started adding politeness features—Amazon introduced a mode where Alexa thanks users for saying “please” 🙏—but the larger issue remains: AI is subtly reshaping how we communicate, and we’re only beginning to grasp the consequences.

Designing AI to be better human beings

This raises a critical question for businesses and leaders building AI-driven experiences: how do we design AI that doesn’t just maximize efficiency, but also fosters positive social behavior? 🤝

If AI is a mirror of human interaction, then the way we create and use it matters more than we think.

Some researchers suggest integrating AI with social reinforcement—teaching AI to model and encourage respectful communication rather than just optimizing for speed and efficiency.

Others propose transparency measures 🔍, so users are always aware of when they’re engaging with AI versus another human.

Either way, this isn’t just an AI ethics debate—it’s about the kind of social norms we want to uphold in an AI-augmented world.

As AI continues to integrate into our daily lives, we should be asking: how is this technology shaping human behavior? And more importantly, is it making us better or worse at being human? 🧠❤️

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Have you noticed AI subtly changing the way you interact with people?

Stay curious! 🙌

-gs

---

Oh, wow! You made it to the end. Click here to 👉 SHARE this issue with a friend if you found it valuable.